Actually.. I've been thinking about this.
Whilst smoking a glorious h.upmann magnum 50 on the deck on Saturday and pairing that up with the most incredible st Agnes xo brandy... I thought to myself about this very same question.
It's been six or seven years for me now of not being a Carlton member and not regularly attending home games.I go to one or two a year these days.. Mostly in the MCC.
So I haven't gone and a couple of cousins stopped becoming members slowly since.. Citing different reasons.
Family
.. Busy work schedule..

But I know it's because I don't go and the experience with the club is different and attending football just isn't fun anymore..
A mate of theirs apparently stopped going as a result as well...



Anyway.. I thought what would it take for me to become a member again?
I always used to think I would return one day..
But while smoking this again stick I had a think about what going to the football used to be for me and what it could be now.
You couldn't get two poles further apart.
The experience is trudging through the park on a Saturday afternoon making your way through a kaleidoscope of autumn leaf colors with yet another expectation of a kill just can never be replicated.
I felt like I have fallen out of love with a partner.. Yeah she's there.. But I don't love her.. I'm just used to her.. A lifetime of knowing her but no feeling on how she's traveling .. Dont feel any quick nookies anymore.. She's got an alcohol problem.. She's playing pokies and yeah she's looking hagged... Sometimes she needs side cash for her habits and she turns on the charm offensive.. I have stopped caring and giving... And I wonder how she ended up like that..
The hottest chick at school.. My friends were so jealous and she just let herself go..
Weirdly I don't think my club can ever earn that trust and love back again.
I don't believe it when it says it's changing. I look at it with a sense of bewilderment at how it got to this... Sure it sometimes gets some work done.. Or a new hair color.. But it's still the same tacky club.. That has lost its charm and there's no way it's ever going to get it back.

I now can't see myself ever returning to football the way it has.
The game has changed
The experience is not the same... The loud shocking music and the guy in the loudspeaker yelling at the top of God voice over my shoulder every few seconds and asking me to hug a neighbor for a pie.. It's all too contrived.. I hate it!
My club hasn't helped it's cause...I just don't have the same feelings for it I once did..
The clean break from attending football has been wonderful.
I don't rush to the ground from doing what I need to do.
I can either watch a game in my living room on a huge screen and surround sound.. Those of you that know me know my eyesight isn't 20/20 .. So no more headaches ( should go to an optometrist some day)
Or I can watch with a mate or cousin...
We can cook up some rib eye steaks bust open a great 2003 cab sav I get my hands on.. The princes park whistler knows what I'm talking about .. Kick back and relax.
I always watch right through to the end no matter how bad.. Bit I'm also sure there will be a time I'll flick it over to another station.
61 games to go of nothingness according to mark RollDaDice.. It's already been fifteen years.. Now he's saying 66 more games.. What he isn't saying is where he expects us to realistically be after those 66 games.
Now would I stop buying great cigars/ scotch / wine/ brandy and great food to go to the football?
I don't see the point...

Life has changed...
This club better understand that...

Take your points absolutely Synners but it is amazing how winning can get the blood rushing to the groins again. It may never be quite the same but it can good again. You can do lots of things with cigars, you know.
She'll always be your girl. Deep down.
Most of us know that. We love her dearly but she keeps throwing it back in our face. We are angry and hurt. Sick of it. It's the dopey, rough crowd she's got in with. Talking to her clearly doesn't work.
Ive stopped buying her flowers and presents too. Until she stops spending it on booze and God-knows-what. Her tits are sagging and the love handles keep growing because she's so lazy now. Living off past glories/conquests that everyone has long forgotten. The blonde tints of the 1980s have long faded.
Everyone laughs when she goes out at the weekend now. They used to be so jealous when she was on our arm. She is unco on the dance floor and can't handle the drink.
But when she does clean herself up, there's gunna be some awesome make-up sex.
You might only give her a peck on the cheek; Jimm will just wanna hold her hand and talk for awhile, DannyB will read her poetry; Grr will get someone else to do it for him; Verbs will get all weird and kinky; Ryan will unleash into one of his wild threesomes just so he can tell us about it; BV will scold her first; BKB will be fine ... he'll just shut his eyes and think ... about ... Krooz ... while Megaman will just drop glib one-liners because he's afraid of saying how he really feels.
She won't be back for awhile. Possibly quite awhile.
But she will. One day. Then we'll realise how much we've missed her.
And I know I won't be able to resist the old tart.




Apologies to our lady posters ....

I ache for the feeling we all enjoyed when we beat Richmond in that final only a few years ago.

Where's it gone?

The logical extension of this analogy is for a TC meet up late at night at Princes Park, where we all turn up in plastic raincoats armed with a form of lubricant looking for any hole in the mortar of the Gardiner Stand, right?

Take your points absolutely Synners but it is amazing how winning can get the blood rushing to the groins again. It may never be quite the same but it can good again. You can do lots of things with cigars, you know.
She'll always be your girl. Deep down.
Most of us know that. We love her dearly but she keeps throwing it back in our face. We are angry and hurt. Sick of it. It's the dopey, rough crowd she's got in with. Talking to her clearly doesn't work.
Ive stopped buying her flowers and presents too. Until she stops spending it on booze and God-knows-what. Her tits are sagging and the love handles keep growing because she's so lazy now. Living off past glories/conquests that everyone has long forgotten. The blonde tints of the 1980s have long faded.
Everyone laughs when she goes out at the weekend now. They used to be so jealous when she was on our arm. She is unco on the dance floor and can't handle the drink.
But when she does clean herself up, there's gunna be some awesome make-up sex.
You might only give her a peck on the cheek; Jimm will just wanna hold her hand and talk for awhile, DannyB will read her poetry; Grr will get someone else to do it for him; Verbs will get all weird and kinky; Ryan will unleash into one of his wild threesomes just so he can tell us about it; BV will scold her first; BKB will be fine ... he'll just shut his eyes and think ... about ... Krooz ... while Megaman will just drop glib one-liners because he's afraid of saying how he really feels.
She won't be back for awhile. Possibly quite awhile.
But she will. One day. Then we'll realise how much we've missed her.
And I know I won't be able to resist the old tart.




Apologies to our lady posters ....

Like talking about the '99 Prelim for all eternity?

Like talking about the '99 Prelim for all eternity?