Daniher to kick the first two goals of the match, the commentators to gush over it well into the second half.

Carlton to kick 25% more behinds than goals.

Essendon*'s goal to behind ratio to be 4:1

Commentators to note how strong and fast several Essendon* players look without even a hint or irony.

Fletcher's incredible age to be mentioned at least thrice per quarter.

Davey to milk a double-free in front of goal.

Carlton to be reduced to a two man bench before 1/2 time.

Zero HTB decisions will be paid for the first 3 quarters.

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"One of my favorite philosophical tenets is that people will agree with you only if they already agree with you. You do not change people's minds." - Frank Zappa

Carlton has INJECTED some speed for tonights game with the inclusion of Judd, Bettts and Lucas.
Irony

The 3 number 1 picks will get a good work over.

James Hird will be lauded as the man to see the lab rats out of the mire that is peptides.

Jamo's will pop out in the first 5 mins and then pop back in again.

Jamo's what exactly?

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#DonTheStash

shoulder

The pre-match Hirdy love sandwich force fed to us by the commentators will induce, simultaneously, projectile vomiting and explosive diarrhoea amongst CFC fans.

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I hope Essendon* folds.

Mitch Robinson to blindly throw the ball on to the boot to rush it forwards

Kane Lucas will miss several tackles

Posters will spew & shit themselves in the match discussion thread in the first half, then we'll come back & win.

_________________
#DonTheStash

I will get drunk.

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The only way for some people to understand is for them to be on the receiving end

Left wing moralists
In self serving denial
They shit me no end

RIP Charlie Kirk (was/were)

I will not.

1st week of a 3 month campaign.

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I hope Essendon* folds.

That's ok, I'll have one for you.

Red time goals....likely from shit free kicks

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WADA medical director Dr Alan Vernec describes Essendon* FC drug case as biggest scandal in team sport the world of sport has seen. #WC2WB

#GUILTY

Just finished a 6 week one. It won't take long.

My hatred for this mob really disturbs me. Is this how the older generation feel about Collingwood and Richmond?

_________________
The only way for some people to understand is for them to be on the receiving end

Left wing moralists
In self serving denial
They shit me no end

RIP Charlie Kirk (was/were)

I was thinking the same on both points on the way home.

Predictions are fun: bombers will play with the benefits of performance enhancing drugs

_________________

_________________
I hope Essendon* folds.

Close...

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Congratulations CK95

Bingo. cauliflower

_________________
The only way for some people to understand is for them to be on the receiving end

Left wing moralists
In self serving denial
They shit me no end

RIP Charlie Kirk (was/were)

I did a Carlton, bottle of red first half, 1 glass second